An Absinthe-Loving, Polyamorous, Kinky, Sex-Positive Couple talk about all things Sex, Kink, and LGBTQ.

Archive for September, 2012

Know That Wherever You Go

My heart will be with you.

 

Today I travel to Long Island, NY to work on a project for my client.  Since my consulting work is still a part-time gig, this means I’m still working my “day job” overnight.  The night before I catch the flight.  I will have 2 hours to shave, shower, and finish packing before leaving for the airport to catch my flight.  Yes, I will be cutting it close.  It’s a good thing I know how to work an airport.

While I’m looking forward to being able to do the hands-on IT work I love, this trip isn’t a “there and back again” day trip.  No, this time I stay until catching a flight home Friday evening.  I’ve handled overnight (and longer) trips for work before.  Back during my full time Corporate IT Support days I would often fly to Atlanta for 3 -4 days at a time, or go to NYC for 3 -4 days.  Every 2 – 3 months I would fly to the company HQ for 5 days.  I spent a week in Denver, a week in Salt Lake City, 3 days in Chicago, 2 days in Indianapolis, 3-4 days in Annapolis at a time, 3-4 days in D.C., and even a week out in San Jose.  Traveling with no notice for extended periods of time is nothing new to me.  What IS new, however, and what causes my internal conflict, is being away from Mrs. AP overnight.

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G’mar Hatimah Tovah

To my SINful friends who observe the High Holidays, may your fast be easy and your Yom Kippur be reflective.

 

Stay SINful, friends.


The Music Moves Me

When I’m away from Mrs. AP for long periods of time – like my 12 hour shifts for work — and need a little pick-me-up, I turn to music.  Music has been a large part of our relationship from the start, and neither of us can go very long without it.  We’ll blast our favorite groups or playlists while we’re cleaning, cooking, working on various digital projects, etc.  There’s one song in particular that always, regardless of where I am or what I’m doing, makes me think of how I feel every time we’re in each other’s arms.  May I present:

VNV Nation – Standing

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Overcoming the Fear of Love

Like many other of the other wonderful bloggers I know — take a moment to check my blogroll to the right for some fine examples — I get a sense of amusement from some of the various search terms that result in somebody new stumbling across my little corner of the internet.  One that stands out as particularly amusing was “husband says absinthe makes his dick hard”.  What’s not to love about that?  This morning, however, I saw a search term appear that got me thinking about just how much people can manage to hold themselves back — or not — on the spectrum that encompasses the swinger and polyamorous couples.  This search term was  “fall in love swinger become exclusive poly with one couple”.

There are many ways to read this term, in large part due to the lack of punctuation.  Was the person searching attempting to find a swinger with whom to fall in love and then, with that person, become polyfidelitous with another swinging couple?  Was this person perhaps already a swinger and was looking to find information on the ways to or likelihood of entering into a poly relationship with another couple?  Could this person perhaps be a single swinger and is looking to join a poly couple in a triad?

Thinking on these possibilities made me realize something that’s hovered around the edges of my consciousness for sometime; something with which I have, at times, struggled.  This something  is a prevalent trend among those who write from within the swinger community, and one that I suspect has arisen from some improper assumptions.  I suspect this because I have been guilty of it, and because of it I inadvertently derailed what could have become a very good thing.  This something, this “it”, is the fear of oneself or one’s partner falling in love with somebody else.

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Logistics of the Unknown

We deal with “what ifs” — the hypothetical situations we all must face when uncertain as to what might happen but for which we want to prepare nonetheless — on a regular basis in our daily lives.  Some are minor things, like not knowing what we might want to cook for dinner during the week when grocery shopping, and others are major, such as not knowing where we might land a job after graduating from college/university.  Trying to run logistics for long-term planning when the results are still hidden from us becomes an interesting game that is part conjecture, part divination.  With some clever planning, attention to detail, and some careful navigation one can usually have a solid plan in place.  What happens, though, when the possibilities and variables involved can lead to multiple solution sets that are all equally valid?  If you’re like Mrs. AP and I, you start planning for them all!  Here’s our load ahead:

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T.M.I. Tuesday – Strip For Me

Today’s T.M.I. Tuesday posting focuses on the subject of stripping, be it for somebody else or by somebody else.  See my answers below.  Find other’s answers through the T.M.I. Tuesday blog.

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Open Sexuality; Open Mind

Mrs. AP and I have had many an interesting, sometimes frustrating conversation over the past few years regarding politics in the United States.  When she first met me — and indeed for some time thereafter — I as very staunchly holding to the views I developed from being raised in a Southern, Military, Lutheran household.  While not entirely on the right of the political spectrum, and in fact testing as a conservative-leaning Libertarian, I found myself more often identifying with the Republican Party than the Democratic Party on matters of spending, defense, and social programs.  Where I vehemently disagreed was in matters regarding sexual and identity freedom, but thought that by tending to the GOP priorities first the road would more easily open for the social changes required for sex, gender, and orientation equality.   I realize now that this view was misguided, a product of a misinformed youth and an ignorant, naive approach to life.    Like many others, I find I can no longer balance the iniquities of the Republican Party against the good I assumed they could do.  What changed in me that I can no longer, in good conscience, align myself with the ideologies of my yesteryears?  In short, I finally matured.

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