Take a Dive
You ever sit back and take stock of how your life has been lately? Just some reflection on how you’re feeling, what you’ve been doing, et cetera? Mrs. AP popped me into that headspace this morning with one very simple comment. As we lay snuggling after I got home from work she was gently playing with me — no urgency, just enjoying the feel of me in her hand — and after several minutes of me taking my time to respond to her ministrations she asked “Have you noticed your sex drive has dropped?” And just like that, I was in self-examination mode trying to figure out what’s going on with me.
It’s true, of course. Mrs. AP is highly perceptive when it comes to me, my moods, and my reactions. She often figures out what’s going on in my head before I do, which is a wonderful blessing for me because she gives insight I seem to lack, but it’s a curse for her when she knows what my issue is and is still waiting for me to figure it out. I’ve been trying to get better at understanding how I tick — I can do it with technical stuff all day long, why not with myself, dammit — but I still very often feel like I’m way behind the eight ball on figuring myself out. Despite that, I started digging around in this cluttered head of mine and I’ve come away with a few things that I think I can change to get me back to being my multiple-times a day randy self again.
- Reduce my stress level. This sounds obvious, right, but really, the past 2 months have been a constant weight of stress on both of us. We found out early May that we were essentially going to have to break our lease one month shy of the lease coming to it’s natural end. We scrambled on my days off to find a new place, and at the very last minute (literally 4 days to spare) a friend came through with a place for us. Almost as soon as we moved in, we had to begin a search for a new car (due to losing the old one for frustrating reasons) and have had that hanging over our head. Combine that with me trying to start work for a client that will (someday) pick me up for a full time position instead of just consulting, and I feel like I’ve had one thing after another piled atop me until I’m near to tumble. I can’t tumble, though. I know once I push through all of this there’s a much better lifestyle for me. I just have to get there.
- Eat better. My diet has taken a hard hit during the past 2 months, so much so that I’ve added a good 10 pounds on top of my already too heavy frame. When I was eating mostly fruits and veggies with yogurt and lean poultry to help give me my protein kicks I felt better, had more energy, and had a higher sex drive. I need to get my good habits back.
- Sleep better. The bed we have right now is not comfortable. I wake up in constant pain, I stay up in constant pain, and I sleep in constant pain. It’s like my lower back is doing it’s best vice grip imitation on my spine, and I know it’s curbing my desire for anything other than relief. Ironically, the endorphin and serotonin rush from orgasm helps, but I’m in too much pain half the time to get there.
- Get out more. Mrs. AP and I have been so wrapped up with the move and settling into a MUCH smaller place that we’ve done nothing with friends or for ourselves. We need more time out and about, relaxing, and rediscovering all the wonderful things we like about each other when we don’t have a TV on and kids needing our attention. Distractions to clear our minds and helps us unwind are sorely needed.
I know I’ll get through this and be back to my chipper, randy, orgasm providing self in no-time. And having this space here to unload and help me organize and understand my scattered thoughts is a tremendous asset. Maybe that’s why I’m here so often?
Any other advice is gladly welcome.
Stay SINful, friends.